Every age group has to handle interesting situations as they mature and experience new things. For people my age (in their mid to late twenties) this often means meeting a special someone, getting married, and starting a family of one's own. Eventually, that is one of the things I hope will occur in my life, but recently I have found it quite interesting to sit back and observe the time of life for friends of mine.
This weekend I saw examples of couples at each end of the spectrum. One is just recently engaged, she had never dated prior to a "chance meeting" of a young man sitting down next to her in a pew in church for several weeks and they eventually went out and fell in love gradually.
Growing up this person was unique, she had few friends but the ones she had were VERY CLOSE!! Insecurity was a struggle, she questioned who would date her since she was not one of the popular girls. Even though this was the case she stayed strong and true to herself, focused on school and when she stopped looking (according to her) the love of her life came into her life. In this sense this young woman is a lot more secure than she thinks she is. Her fiancee loves her for who she is nothing has changed. He loves her analyzing nature,her tendency to argue, but he knows when she needs someone to stand up to her and other times when she needs a soft place to fall.
Then there are others I see that get married and I have NO Doubt they are in love but it seems that the insecurity is pervasive even in the marriage relationship.
This is exemplified in situations where the young wife is visiting in laws and she asks her husband constant questions about simple activities. "The dog is out of water, do you think I should give him more?" The question was continually posed until it was answered. I don't understand how a young woman who is smart feels that every decision no matter how small should go through her husband. This is a Christian couple and I do believe biblical principles should be followed in a relationship/marriage such as being submissive. However I don't think giving the dog more water qualifies.
It is one of my hopes for the future to find a partner for life and get married eventually, and although I have had some issues with being insecure in relationships when I was younger and immature. I have grown and I gain great hope from seeing stories like the first one play out in the lives of my closest friends.
I only hope I can be a support to some of the others who in my opinion might benefit from some empowerment
2 comments:
I agree with one of the comments that your friend made about when you are not looking and being totally fine with being single is when love springs up out of no where. Which is something I struggle with a lot, especially now. I can't make someone like me, even though I think they should. So I have to be comfortable being single, and not even worry about being in a relationship right now, besides the one I have with God, that I need to work on deepening.
I agree with the your comments. I have come to the stage where I am detaching and allowing blessings to come in God's way. It was really difficult to get to this point. I have learned to catch myself when I get down on myself or think negatively because that would just be slowing the process. I am focusing on love of self and forming a deeper relationship with God. Ultimately, the love God has to teach me really is true love. Then I know the love I have with a partner will be coming from a pure place.
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